Rule #8

Don't be afraid of faculty. They can smell fear.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/3545435/The-smell-of-fear-is-real-claim-scientists.html

Rule #7

It is never...never...never ok to be in the library on a friday night during the summer unless you are working on a major project (i.e., your dissertation or the precursors of it) or you are one of these guys and you are on a quest to find Zelda.

Rule #6

There are conversations that are appropriate for the library, and there are conversations that are not. Know the difference.

Rule #5

Never, under any circumstances, ever go to events sponsored by undergrad organizations... just trust us on this

Rule #4

Every group of grad students should have a past time. 2/3rds of us suggest keg kickball. But whatever you do, take time to play.

Rule #3

Understand correlations. No really, understand them. And then say this 10 times everyday. "Correlation does not equal causation." Seriously, say it. Learn it. Live it. Otherwise you might as well go be a pirate.

Rule #2

Rule #2: Always read the methods and results section of articles. There will be a time when you wish you had. You might think it's covered well enough in the discussion, but if that was true, they wouldn't have labeled them separately.

Rule #1

After a LONG hiatus, we have decided to post rules. Rules out there for the future graduate student. We couldn't have gotten where we are without the fabulous mentorship of our predecessors, so in tribute and in hopes to help those out there starting graduate school, here are our rules. Follow them. They will help.

Rule #1
Tell yourself it's worth it everyday, even when the job market doesn't look great and you can't remember the last time you ate